Directed by Stephen Elliott
Running Time: 1:41
Rated R for some strong violence, sexuality, language and brief drug content.

There are no words to describe how horrible Eye of the Beholder was. This movie was so bad, it made Double Jeopardy look like Schindler's List, and we all know how I felt about Double Jeopardy. This movie was so amazingly bad, I don't even know where to begin. I must have checked my watch a dozen times waiting for this monstrosity to be over. How in the hell does a movie like this get made?

Let's start with what is supposed to be the plot. Ewan McGregor plays "The Eye" (get it?), a British Secret Service Agent. He is asked to follow the son of some rich guy to find out if the son is stealing from his trust account. While staking out the kid, he sees Joanna Eris (Ashley Judd) kill the kid. Instead of being an officer of the law and telling on her, he decides to follow her around. Apparently because the ghost of his missing child tells him to. So while Joanna (or whatever her name is at various times through the film) goes around killing people and screaming about her Daddy, The Eye just follows her around. Somehow everywhere she goes, he manages to get a place to stay really close to her, and set up various spy cameras and hidden microphones. She wanders around aimlessly going all over the United States looking for god knows what. The Eye falls in love with her and will do anything to make sure she doesn't fall for anyone else, going so far as to attack and later kill her fiancée. I have no idea what else the plot was supposed to be. I'm not even sure there was a plot. Just a lot of voyeurism and Ashley Judd wearing a lot of different wigs.

This movie was crap. No two words about it, it was crap. And I got the feeling everyone in the packed audience felt the same way. I should have walked out the minute the opening credits rolled. But no, I thought, hey, how bad could it be? Well, this movie has now entered my list of the top 5 worst films I have ever seen in my life. We're talking a few thousand movies I've seen over my 27 years, and this is one of the worst. I felt so sick and disgusted after walking out of the theater, I had to rent Dudley Do-Right to make me feel better. First off, the story was preposterous and annoying. Secondly, the characters had no redeeming qualities whatsoever. I was wishing they'd all die just to make the movie interesting. Third, the music was some of the worst I've heard in a film. Every so often the music would get really loud, as if they were trying to cover up the crap on film. I read that this movie was made before Ashley made Double Jeopardy (and I still don't know how that movie made any money), and before Ewan became the man in The Phantom Menace. Hopefully their careers won't suffer too much because of this film. I still don't have any proof that Ashley Judd is a good actress, but she definitely has a star quality about her. Sadly, star quality doesn't help this script get any better. Every time she cried and screamed about Daddy and Christmas, I wanted to shoot myself so I wouldn't have to listen to her.

There were two saving graces in the movie. One was the fact that no one seemed to talk a lot. So I didn't have to listen to Judd try and act. I think she had two monologues throughout the entire film. Oh yeah, before I forget, k.d. lang, please stick to your day job. Like I said, I don't think Ashley Judd is that good an actress, but k.d. lang makes Judd look like Meryl Streep. Who thought of casting her in this role? The second saving grace lasted only about 5 minutes, and that was Jason Priestly. His role as the psychotic druggie was the only decent thing about the movie. Of course he shows up late in the film, and then gets the hell kicked out of him 5 minutes later. But for every second he was on screen, he made the movie that much better.

So overall, Eye of the Beholder, to put it bluntly, sucked. I can't believe I paid $9.50 to sit through an hour and 40 minutes of sheer hell. I would rather sit and watch The Mod Squad 100 times than sit through this movie again. If you only listen to me once then listen to me now... Do not, for any reason, go see this movie. Yes, Ashley Judd gets naked, briefly, but if you want to see her naked, go out and rent the TV movie she did with Mira Sorvino about Marilyn Monroe. Eye of the Beholder was, and probably will forever be, one of the worst films I ever see in my life.

Click on the link for more information on Sick and Twisted Jokes, which this movie was
or on Depression, a state this movie put me in to.

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