for action violence, sexual content and language.
as Jimmy Tong
Jennifer Love Hewitt
What a waste of time. A non-sensical plot, a horrible combination of stars and an overall feel of 'huh?' Really not one to see.
The story - as it is - has Jackie Chan playing Jimmy Tong, a driver to secret agent Clark Devlin. When Mr. Devlin is hurt, Jimmy for some reason feels he owes something to Devlin and decides to take his place. He puts on a super charged Tuxedo which gives him the power to do just about anything. He is teamed up with Del Blaine (Jennifer Love Hewitt) who is some kind of scientist. Together they try and foil a plot to contaminate the country's water supply so that people will have to use bottled water.
I don't even know where to begin... this movie was just boring from the start. Let's just go with the scattershot technique of writing... I can't understand half of what Jackie Chan says when he speaks... the plot made no sense. Using bugs to contaminate the country's water supply so that some kind of bottled water cartel can make more money?... There was no humor in the movie... Jackie Chan and Jennifer Love Hewitt as a team? Who thought that one up?... Action sequences too few and far between... A tuxedo that controls human behavior?... The idea that there was even a slight hint of a chance that Hewitt and Chan could be romantically involved? Dear God it made me sick. I understand the older man/younger woman thing - sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. But this? I mean, why don't we have a movie where the Olsen twins, playing Muffy and Buffy Hardbody, bio-terrorism experts, become romantically involved with CIA director Johnson played by Rodney Dangerfield? I mean, that's how totally horrifying the thought of Chan and Hewitt together is to me.
Now as readers of my reviews know, I love Jennifer Love Hewitt, so she is the only reason this movie wasn't a complete failure. I mean, I can understand what she was thinking when the script was handed to her... 'Oh, a Jackie Chan action/comedy... it made a huge star out of Chris Tucker, if it makes money it's a guaranteed sequel where I can make some real cash... sure, I'll do it. Plot? What plot? Who cares about the plot?' And Jackie Chan... I know what he was thinking 'Money? You want to throw a lot of money at me to play a simpleton who suddenly can kick ass? Well, I'm not sure I can do that, I've never had to do that before, but sure... why not?'
THE BOTTOM LINE
So overall my final thought is this... Don't Go See This Movie!
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